118: we don’t even care, restless as we are

sunday — brunch at wild rocket, a walk about mt emily park, being cryptic with directions. we watched happy birthday at the cathay, a fitting but very bittersweet movie. a lot of subterfuge, half-truths, and omissions later, we arrived at the final destination only to be spoilt by an attempt at urban stealth warfare (which failed terribly). and then karaoke, so that when i arrived back home i could almost fall asleep standing. but quite a successful birthday surprise, no?

in the afternoon

hilarity in the park!

at dinner, after pretending to be surprised

the food

pretending to be triad members

2 cakes for the boy who turns 22!

the darlie commercial series 1-2 (FAIL)-3

the family reunion :D

lots of pretty girls (: and boys showing their calvin klein boxers

what’s left (quite substantially) of OG7


my sex partner

karaoke antics (:


117: things will be great when you’re downtown

i went shopping for the first time in three weeks today. that sounds like a pretty short time, but the past three weeks have been very long indeed. predictably, given the heavy workload, i haven’t been spending much, mainly just food (and the occasional supper). i haven’t had to pay for petrol this month, either, and my mum is being pretty nice about it.

despite that, though, during these three weeks i somehow promised myself i’d stop buying clothes at least for this month, since i spent some money on a dress (lovely, mind you) and a sublime top (whee, expanding vocabulary — but then again, this is coming from someone who deals with the words ‘recalcitrant’ and ‘replete’ on a regular basis).

so clearly my resolution broke, seeing as its nearing the end of the month and i still have money i haven’t spent. it’s actually bad because i should really start saving so i can be one of those people who derive great happiness just by seeing the number in my bank account increase. but there are so many things to buy! and all my anticipation about chinese new year in the next three weeks are getting me quite excited — not just the food, but the shopping and the new clothes. somehow i find my extra-curricular pursuits getting less and less intellectual the heavier the workload becomes in school. small comforts, i guess. the people currently in bangkok who slaved for the better part of the week just to hand up their memo before they flew off will attest. and what did i buy? i bought a present for j, whose 22nd is tomorrow, and the original reason why i went out in the first place despite the cloudy and imminently inclement weather (ho); and a sundress! another dress! a very pretty, black and white, horrendously loud-printed dress. i’d have preferred to be in yellow or red or some similarly happy and bright colour. but i love it anyway.

everyone spell random for me!

(yes, the point of this post was to tell you about my lovely dress, which i will wear tomorrow!)

walking around, though, a few things were readily observable.

singaporeans seem less afraid of looking stupid these days; they’re daring to wear more exciting and outlandish stuff! (spell random again!) some of it was really bizarre (and i cannot understand the fascination with bloomers. i suppose it could look nice, but only if your legs are about 5 feet long, which is only slightly shorter than me. short dumpy me cannot compare) but some of it was quite nice! you’ll get no description from me, though, because i don’t remember.

also, i was at zara today and i came across the most orgasmic leather bag. it is actually affordable. I WANT. (but after chinese new year)

old men are fascinated by young lives. on the bus back home today it was heartwarming to see a thin, sober-looking old man who looked like he’d been through too much heartbreak burst into a smile when the toddler opposite him reached over and attempted to grab his shirt. lovely.

another one bites the dust. scotts shopping centre, land of the only lonely coffee bean in town worth mugging in (even on weekends), has closed. i have no idea what has happened to picnic court.

saturday crowds are insane. i refuse ever to shop on a weekend if i can help it.

i want to buy a pair of metallic rubber flipflops to replace the white/pink one that i bought years ago in sec3 (that chue and lijun also have! though they probably threw theirs out ages ago) that i also disposed of after i returned from bangkok. heeren is a veritable shopping paradise, really. it’s been much better these few years. not to mention the $2.50 wanton mee at graffiti cafe.

CHINESE NEW YEAR IS COMING! that means a whole long afternoon of steamboat, stewed duck, fish maw soup, steamed fish, lots of abalone, pineapple tarts (only cny goodie i actually eat), mahjong, blackjack, monkeying around with crazy cousins, and angbao money!

116: lovely lovely lovely

it’s been a long time since i’ve posted. i’m happy to say that after three weeks of slaving (okay, two. or 1.5) i have finally finished my memo! a day ahead of time so i have saturday free. WHEE.

‘ve been staying in school till late this week, just to get research done over finding various statutes and parliamentary debates and whatnot. i’ve also come to the conclusion that english parliamentary debates are a bitch to read through, though thankfully i didn’t have to use them. but just saying.

have been eating lots though, and having dinner at weird times like 10pm (again). oh well.

a lovely weekend awaits!

115: there’s a lot of work to be done


the world’s beautiful only if you pause to look at it. felt sick on thursday but ironically spent the day concussing in the student lounge while the boys were playing pool, braved the rain and drove back home where we spent the rest of the day holed up in my room trying to study. friday passed in a blur, talking nonsense with rz and zhang, watching the rest practice for dance, having reverso ice-cream bought for me! so nice! watched pan’s labryinth with lily wong and friends (for synopses/opinions on the movie, please see cheryl’s/jojoy’s blog… i am sometimes still too traumatised to talk about it, though it was good) and talked about the future of law camp at dubliners after that. we seem always to end up drinking on friday.

yesterday it rained for a long time in a long time. the week’s been so infernally hot i wondered where the rain went to, after its repeated appearance every day for the past few weeks. it’s good, though, it makes the weather cool and bearable, even though its wet, and we can all pretend we’re somewhere else when you see people wrapping up (i saw charmelia in a woolly turtleneck the other day!) — holed up in the library with sam and pakwing and justin, getting unbearably hungry and having al-ameen for dinner (again! we’re getting fat :() and eventually trudging back to get more work done. it was quite a productive day, and it ended well, so on a sunny sunday i am very happy indeed :D

but it’s off to work again after i get some lunch! seems like we’re back to those days, and it’s the second week of school.

113: when i’m sad, she comes to me

now edited, with pictures!

the first week of school’s passed! and it was hell. friday was chilling out at timbre and being generally happy, which was good, considering that the timetable this semester is really horrendous, and i don’t even feel like driving to school anymore. :( i was supposed to meet them at the national museum (gee, how atas, haha) but i overslept and had to have dinner at home. by the time i got to the relevant mrt station i got a call, and had to backtrack to newton where i got picked up so i could direct us both to timbre without any mishaps. mich, cheryl and i wore dresses! somehow a major miscommunication happened and we (okay, i) forgot to tell jojoy. i’m sorry jojoy! i promise not to mention the word ostracise in your presence ever again… :D

lots of girly pictures (courtesy of jojoy), and the music was lovely as usual. talked to the staff, and even ran into edward whom i haven’t seen in … well since i last worked there, and he commented that this is the first time i’ve seen you not about to drop dead and die… and considering i’ve been “working” for him since i was 16, that’s really quite an achievement.

jgan, who was in charge of taking this picture, was continually expressing his amazement at how the three of us took up the same space as the two of them. considering we’re all roughly about the same size (aside from cheryl and mich, who are, in jgan’s words, mini people), it’s really quite odd. but maybe it was just the positioning.

and here is the rest of us in a spectacularly act-cute picture, on a big table at timbre, being retarded as usual, with nic added.

yesterday five of us watched eric clapton. it was quite mind-blowing (: and he played little wing! and wonderful tonight, and we all ran down to the front of the stage (well, almost) when he played layla. it was terribly short, though, and he didn’t play a lot of familiar songs, but still, oh well. found out ian ho and karl were there too, and consequently spent a substantial part of the morning talking to ian about the concert. haha (: and it was packed.

i’m sorry my face is so dark. but no flash photography was allowed (and i really didn’t want to get kicked out before it even started). and law school outings need to stop being about one girl and a bunch of guys. in protest of the horrendously short concert we all sat in jon’s car with the windows rolled down and i shot the sheriff blasting out through the windows, while numerous angmoh men with chinese girlfriends in tow walked by and gave us looks of Disdain.

following a failed attempt to have supper at geylang with two stadiums’ worth of people — there was a singapore-vietnam soccer match going on, apparently, and the streets were somehow flooded with vietnamese (jon: “i don’t care how orgasmic the beef hor fun is, i’m not driving in this kind of traffic”), we dragged an unwilling patrick all the way to thomson after threatening to drive all the way to beauty world. hope he didn’t get into too much trouble at home… but the bak chor mee was nice. (:

today’s a lazy, rainy day. i like.

although, something that really gets me is the way people spend too much. or focus too much on spending money they don’t have. you’d think maybe at some point in time they’d have learnt, by now, not to be so … i don’t know, it’s just pretending to be atas when you don’t have the means, and that irks me, because if you can’t, you just can’t. and it’s not something to be ashamed about, but just … don’t. eugh. how bloody annoying.

112: remember 2006

it all started with — rainy days, trudging about the MRT in jackets and jeans, visiting the lobbies of various hotels. then the school year started, and was filled with bouncy and rebellious ri boys, some lovable, some not, amazing and pretentious english, backstabbing and bitchy colleagues, singing the ri school song every monday or friday (i can’t remember now), having a happy chinese new year, mending broken relationships, getting results back, doing better than expected, calling my mum and dad and hugging shuki in front of mr B, how we all had the same results, the marche dinners, karaoke sessions, and that final dance in the moonlight. then began the scholarship applications, the horrendous essays, filling in forms, going for interviews, waiting for universities to reply, most impatiently, dreaming of england and all its glories, arguing with my mother again and again (and again) over whether to stay or go or stay or go, talking about the same old same old thing a thousand times over lunch and dinner, never able to make a decision till that fateful day in which i learnt the truth. and from then on it was pretty obvious. all the while i waitressed, walked up and down the aisles of 70 tables, plugging food and alcohol as if i knew what it was all about, memorising what was in the menu, all the prices, what went into a particular drink, losing (quite happily) a few kg in the process, working long shifts with colleagues, discovering a neighbour in the process!, having a just-ORDed army boy buy me a drink while i was working, sweeping the floors before and after work, clearing the place of leaves. then came CAP, with all the memories of writing and school, meeting both old and new people all with a common passion, working tirelessly till the wee hours of the night writing reports and columns and having post-mortems in the ops room in eusoff hall, staining the stacks of aCAPpella with my blood from all the papercuts, dealing with a little hwachong incident. then i went to cecilia’s wedding with “i am an idiot — i rejected king’s” scrawled on my arm (thanks to brendan) in bright pink marker, took lots of pretty pictures and once again entertained fantasies of the day i’d get to walk down the aisle too, heh. a few weeks later came law camp, which was a blast, meeting new people which marked the beginning of all the interesting scandals, clubbing at MOS for free on a thursday, bonding with my lovely OG watching the world cup and winning a bet with joel over the germany-argentina match; was very very sad that germany got kicked out by italy, going home at 5am after every game, having emo talks with kenny in PS, watching the finals in my house, patrick staying over, going to the first day of rag the next day (ohoho), getting roped into doing funny stunts, which then took up the rest of my life, rag camps, having emo talks about life and love till the wee hours of the morning with dennis and jgan and rz, how we all grew closer in that small window of time, till school started and lessons began, the clubbing, the atas eating places, the bars, the drinking, late night suppers, how the emo talks with rz continued all the way till september (*wink), more clubbing and parties, talking on overhead bridges and at bus stops in the middle of the night, adam road, walking down botanic gardens, the slow, tentative beginnings. all the while dealing with the pressures of memos, mid-sem tests, binders, exams, going to school on sundays and staying till 11 each day, scouring the library and jostling other people for books, sitting at the same table everyday, studying studying studying. then holidays came, i read more fiction than i ever did in the past three months, had a great christmas, went to bangkok, had a lovely new year, now i’m back, and tomorrow school begins and i’m all ready to tackle a beautiful year.like rz says, so lovely (:

111: i give you special student discount, 300 baht

the last day of 2006 was eventful, to say the least. from boarding the free seating tiger airways and irritating fellow passengers all the way to bangkok with our noise and nonsense, we arrived hollering down the aisles and barging our way out of the terminal. once we got on the bus we waited and waited and waited for the bus to move only to find out we were 5 metres further away from our destination, because the bus reversed instead of moving forward. the sights are fascinating, though, and we photo-whored all the way into town, amusing the rest of the passengers (which seems to be a trend, we provide live entertainment everywhere) while patrick kept imitating borat and we kept screaming for sam to take his shirt off and get molested by gayboys.

it was all joy and laughter till we went exploring the area for a nice place to have dinner. when we finally settled in, somebody messaged kwek saying 7 bombs just went off in bangkok — right about the time we were on the bus into town, though we didn’t hear or see anything, continuing in our happy cocoon of bliss. it was scary when we found out, i guess — kwek kicked into soldier mode and called the embassy and made sure everything was okay, the boys ran to 7-11 to stock up on water (and bought beer, and chips, and nothing else) while we all walked back separately in groups after the restaurant rushed to settle our bills so they too, could go home. it was frightening — but when you’re removed from the danger you can’t really feel much, though it still looms ever-present, the threat of more bombs going off while you’re walking on the street. it seems trivialising to say now that we’ve never been so close to almost dying before, but the thought stays at the back of your head, and comes off the top of your head, so easily. it’s so difficult to imagine, but the danger is so real.

on the way back it was strange because i wondered what would happen if all the beggars, sitting harmlessly by the wayside, ended up dead in the hours of the morning traffic, while more bombs went off outside our hostel over the new year, while we were (relatively) comfortably esconced in our rooms playing stupid card games and getting high on beer, our idea of punishment being not being able to go to the toilet, while later sitting and wishing random italians a happy new year. the ones whom nobody remembers to remember, or even forget. all these people who suddenly disappear, without a trace, while the world runs on into the rest of its days.

here the city is at its cut-throat best. the kittens sneak their way around dogs lazing on the pavement, though they pose no harm. it’s funny, their country and ours, even the differences are in small things. how the cats here know enough not to be afraid of the dogs, as if all the animal instinct has been bred out of them. in singapore they’re all afraid of people, and the enemy of your enemy is your friend. at the markets everyone looks to sell their goods; some give you attitudes when you bargain and walk away not buying, some try their best and throw in everything and a smile. in their musical, sing-song voices they entice you, they beckon you over, feeding you sweet-sounding lies after lies about this being their lowest price. things are different, though, if you’re asian, and they skin the caucasians alive. which is lovely, despite it being in a racist sort of way, but it underlies the communal tradition, a remnant from thailand’s subtle and invisible colonialism. it makes small allowances in a country where people continuously struggle to maintain an existence, proud and polite as they are.

here there is no shame. somehow seeing foreigners with one of the numerous, willing thai girls bring to mind all the strange and weird sexual encounters i’ve read about on worldsexguide.com (don’t visit if you’re underage and/or squeamish about porn ads, but once you get past the sexual descriptions and vulgarities it paints a fascinatingly grim picture of the social fabric that survives on the underground sex tourism that goes on in the world) and it disgusts me slightly, this vast continent of whites that prey and feed on asia, just as they’ve always done. in bangkok there is no seedy underbelly; the girls are open and unashamed, they lift their heads and walk with a grace you don’t find in geylang or anywhere else. when the boys walk by the men eye them with open interest, even though their arm is around another man. sometimes a whole row of them will line the pavement of the street just outside a bar, and it’s an amazingly fish tank-like experience, walking by in single-file as if you were displayed for them to pick out. it’s unnerving — but here the boys are forward, and don’t care much about propriety. caitlin says it’s because one of the thai kings used to be gay, and they found it impossible to divorce the near-fanatic reverence for the monarchy with his apparent decadence. and here the king is everywhere, his portrait on the streets and in the shopping centres and markets and restaurants, a veritable father presiding over a country where anything goes, but everything works.

in between the days of endless shopping where we scored cheap t-shirts, dresses, belts and shoes — joanna bought 4 bags’ worth of stuff and joel even had to lend her his extra bag — we managed to run across the road holding cup noodles full of hot water over the overhead bridge and having supper every night. we tried to sleep before joel so we’d all avoid his snoring, but always caitlin and i ended up having to plug our ipods in so we could drown out the sound. on the last night joanna joined in the snoring, and the jos conducted a symphony between them the entire night. it was harrowing.

the rest of it all passes in a blur: sam’s shit clogs up the toilet bowl, dennis, christine and zhengx keep oversleeping, the toilets are always flooded after a bath, raffli and caitlin singing horrendously while in the shower, dancing furiously at bedsupperclub where zhengx picked up a thai girl and spent a whole day with her and her honda civic (and her uncle, who was translator), concussing on the lovely white beds at bedsupperclub, the obscenely-priced drinks, the way everything closes at two, the drunk angmohs and their gayboys and thai girls, the random bursts of yellow on the streets, the bombs, the car wreck by the side of the road due to the impact, the happy christmas and new year lights all around screaming happy new year 2007, the cool shops in the big shopping centres, the immaculately clean food courts, the insanely dirty side-streets packed full with roadside stalls and lovely cheap food, random graffiti on the sidewalks about thaksin and singapore, watercoolers along the street that don’t work, numerous black canyon coffees, twisting my ankle on a step that said mind your step, justin and sam getting eyed by gayboys, a&w meals, cabs that con you if you don’t insist on asking for the meter, observing people on the train, crazy pictures.

and you know what, as a completely random point, i should have bought black instead of red heels! arrrr!

110: you look like student

hi all, we’re back from bangkok, land of the bombs! :D okay it sounds less serious now, but it was pretty scary while we were there, on the first two days at least. we spent the new year watching CNN and wondering why we didn’t just go to some other place for a holiday instead. but that said, there were fun times to be had, crazy things to do, stuff to be bought (!!), lots of food to be eaten — all in all, despite not spending it the usual party-hard way, it was still a mind-bogglingly memorable new year.

there’ll be a more thoughtful post soon, but meanwhile the pictures are here (:

at the budget terminal (first time flying tiger airways!), waiting to board. caitlin and i; the jos in bangkok

the girls, once we finally reached! jojoy, risse, chris, huiling — we’re missing jo!

junqiang and kwek being gay.

OUR NEW YEAR, spent in the hostel dorms playing random card games, 7-up and YEE-HA! with sam half-drunk (he passed out later only to wake up periodically to shout “13” and “15” as well as “big titty cowgirl”, which was a winner) and 24 bottles of beer chang, plus a totally random new year dance with a big italian family that was having dinner outside our hostel.
raffli drank water.

on new year’s day, we went to mah boon krong. in the morning justin and i took a walk around the area and saw 3489645967 people in yellow. so when we went out later, we decided to join in the fun!

the girls at dinner. valda came out to join us!

dennis and junqiang act gay at dinner, and while at some bar. but the reactions are so different!

drinking in thailand is fantastic, because the bottles are half the price and more importantly, the mixers come in old-school bottles that you just don’t get here anymore. here we are on the rooftop of at barber, which was a beautiful place, though it was next to a gay bar and all the boys got eyed walking up the stairs…

our obligatory mirror shot

you’ll probably only understand the absurdity of bangkok traffic if you drive yourself. just look:

OUTSIDE SIAM STATION. patrick flashes; patrick and jon act girly; headless junqiang wants head!

emo boys on a bridge

outside siam paragon, where i scored a dress! WHEE!

outside bedsupperclub. fantastic place (: (:

then we trooped off to dinner, couldn’t find anything cheap and/or nice, so we settled for this random hole in the wall japanese place that turned out not to be so hole in the wall after all, and had beautiful food!

this is also the picture in which junqiang looks insanely dwarf-like and short if you don’t look carefully.
of course the hijinks ensue!

it would’ve been all right if the next table didn’t burst into reminiscence (god i can’t spell this word, and i hate bad spelling) and simultaneously into song, which included various horrendous renditions of childhood traumatic versions of baby one more time and nsync and god knows what. hear no evil! look at their disgusted faces, trained by years of glastonbury arrogance



after dinner we headed in and had mad gay drunk fun.

the morning after! in which dennis commented that this was the first time in a long time they weren’t toasting anything alcoholic. but that’s root BEER! ahaahhaah

at suan lum night market that night (: there are cool shops!

we were happy campers at central world the next day!

random stool arrangement on the ground floor


bizarre toys

LAST DAY! which was earlier today, actually. our last A&W meal in a long long long long time…

last shot of bangkok at the airport!